All posts by nightsparrow

Shadow and Reflection


Your shadow is determined by the light. If the sun is low the shadow is long. If the sun is rising that shadow falls behind you. If the sun is setting the shadow looms in front of you. When the sun is high in the sky your shadow is below but at one with you. It is in balance.

Your reflection however is a constant, except in clarity. Sometimes cloudy, sometimes clear, depending on the source. We chose our source. What is it you are projecting/reflecting onto humanity.

The light and shadow speak to your Divinity. Your reflection speaks to your Humanity. Divinity is objective and Humanity is subjective. You are God’s instrument, God’s mission to balance Divinity and Humanity. This is a time of finding Equilibrium.  Do not fail. You can not fail, God does not fail.


copyright 2017

The Wall

As she stood against the wall,
Standing straight. 
Standing tall.
Smooth as glass, she could not climb,
She must ascend, can’t look behind.
The birds had grown their wings to serve,
When they could no longer live bound to Earth.
Her wings were just thoughts within her mind,
Wings she could grow from the other side.
She looked past the Owl, who dared dream by day,
But then heard her own voice “Here you must stay.” 

So gently she knelt beside the wall,
Kneeling soft. Kneeling small.
Mute as the mountain she struggled to pray.
She must descend, she cannot stay.
The birds sing songs to find fellow souls,
When songs turn to prayer they will heal and console.
Her wounds still thoughts fresh in her mind.
Wounds she could heal, from some other side.
She reached towards a sparrow who dared to be plain.
But she heard her soul speak “You can’t hold her pain.” 

Yearning she’d reach up to the sky,
Reaching out. Reaching  high.
Without her wings she longed to leap,
But bound to earth her roots ran deep.
Angels stand ready to lift broken Ones,
When unlived dreams leave songs unsung.
Her dreams and songs this life denied,
Visions she could seek, from some other side.
She imagined her Angels, who dared trust The One.
And she heard in her Heart “The Soul dies to none” 

P. Ciavardone

Copyright 2014. Face the Mountain. All rights reserved 


The Order of Chaos

As the earth needs the churning winds to drive the storm,

Quenching floods to feed the soil,

Volcanic outburst to craft new islands and mountains,  

and destructive earthquakes to create new landscapes,

The Universe will sometimes  bring chaos into our psyche so that we too can erect mountains  and design beautiful new landscapes that feed our souls and help us weather the passing storms.



Copyright 2013. Face the  All rights reserved

Alone or Lonely

alone or lonely

Alone I feel the earth through my feet, the world through my heart and the Universe through my thoughts. As one single piece of the infinite creation, I am Alone, but with Everything.

Loneliness is to stand on the earth and not touch it. It is to not see the world around you through your heart or feel the other souls passing through this same space of Everything. Loneliness is to make yourself the Lone thought in your own creation.

– P. Ciavardone

Copyright 2013. Face the  All rights reserved

Her Legacy

You know what its like to sit unnoticed between the road and the edge of peaceful waters. To watch the small children run by, not even a glance. To the clouds in the sky you ask “Why am I here?”

“To teach”.  You know, but what and how? Your movement through their lives is so slow they can not even perceive it. You are a perfect creature of the Universe and you obey its every command. To be totally still unless moved by the wind. To shelter whatever creature chooses to tear a hole in your being. To teach the children about joy even as they break your own young limbs. And as you grow to be taller and stronger then you ever imagined that even they could be, you pull them up into your heart so that they can experience the joys of watching the world dance around them while hidden in you invisibility. 

And when they come to walk their own children by you, again without noticing you, you shower them with all of the beautiful colors they could never have imagined, until you are worn and naked, and face another winter exposed and alone but dreaming of spring.Silver_Lake Lola

Then once again after many years she strolls by, but now, with bittersweetness, she slows and turns towards you and rests her weary bones on your legacy to be one with the earth through you again. And through her you are taller than the mightiest tree still standing, as your soul joins with her’s to reach from the rooted earth to her heart and on to heaven because you have taught her that. And without her ever noticing.

 -P. Ciavardone

Copyright 2013. Face the Mountain. All rights reserved


The Waterfall

waterfall close

Sometimes just living life feels like clinging to that last slippery rock on the edge of what seems to be a great waterfall, in a driving rainstorm. You can’t see past the edge where the water drops off but you can hear the crashing water, so loud it almost drowns out the thunderous storm swirling above your head and conspiring to help push you over that edge.

 Between the rock and the safety of the shores on either side, everything that passes heads earnestly over that edge. A myriad of creations, not thinking, not struggling, but you  watch as that log slides just past the edge, dips its root end down and its arms reach once again to the sky, briefly celebrating the life it lived. Then it quickly disappears beneath the horizon that is the waterfalls’ edge into the frenzy of the nothingness below. You know nothing of that “nothingness” except your fear of it and you wonder “if that great old man of the forest succumbed so easily, what can I do?”

Your little hands clasped about the rock, while the rest of your body is pulled and tugged towards the inevitable and in a moment of terror you feel the base of the rock loosen just a little. You know any control you think youhave over this decision is running out. Your hands can’t hold to the rock forever, you are only human. Even so, if faced with an eternity of just holding on, is that what you want?

The rock you cling to is battling the rushing water rising from the storm, beaten by debris and pulled by your anchor, it cannot hold you forever. The storm that rages above will subside but others will follow and some will be even fiercer. And on either side, even the shores that cannot be reached may have meadows but surely they also have their own dark nights, hungry beasts and perilous cliffs.

So the path that is laid before you is to let go and trust. All the frightful sounds you hear ahead of you are undefined except by the stories in your own head. You have all the power to let go of the stories you have told yourself about those unknown sounds ahead and let them be what they are, which is the sound of God’s story. And the Universe is asking you to trust and be a part of that Great Story. Like the beautiful tree had shown as it flowed ahead of you and into God’s story, celebrating what it had become. Because once you find the peace to let go of the certainty ,hat only exist in your head, and  flow with the waterfall, what is on the other side becomes a story between you and God.

– P.Ciavardone

Copyright 2013. Face the Mountain. All rights reserved

Hope & Believe

While awakening to our own ability to create  better reality for ourselves, people seem to be moving away from the word Hope. Maybe because the word implies the possibilities of struggle and set backs. No matter how much we think we get it, we will continue to face struggle along the way. Hope is still a beautiful word in my book. Hope is what catches us when we are falling and Believing is what gives us the wings to get off the ground.

– P.Ciavardone Butterfly on pavement brighter

Copyright 2013. Face the Mountain. All rights reserved


Define success…then let it go. Like a minnow in the stream, who knows where it will go or what it will feed, but like everything else born in the stream it is part of the flow.

Build your alters in the stream, for the stream, to the steam and those too will flow away when the storm comes. Some to rest on the bottom in blissful peace and some to tumble on to be part of the next monument.

What is success? The minnow that swims with the flow of the stream? The peaceful stone awash on the bottom, looking through and feeling the flow of the water? Or the lives and the monuments we build that will ultimately also belong to the flow of the stream.


Copyright 2013. Face the Mountain. All rights reserved




DSCF3260When we let ourselves evolve, that doesn’t make our past selves any less valid. All of our experience, emotions, adventures and misadventures have bought us to where we are. Stepping stones to the self that you have become and the soul you are still becoming. There is nothing to forgive and nothing to forget and everything to continue to grow towards.



Copyright 2013. Face the Mountain. All rights reserved


Even when it seems impossible, the ordinary rises to touch the sun and the sun reaches back to touch the ordinary and then we realize this has happened again and again every second of every day forever before and forever after. We often just fail to see it and it is in the seeing  that the ordinary becomes the Extraordinary.

Rose of Sharon cropped


 Copyright 2013. Face the Mountain. All rights reserved

Almighty Silence

I asked the mountain ” Why am I here?”

The Mountain answered “to Learn”

I asked the mountain “What can you teach me? What have I journeyed all this way to learn?”

Powerfully the Mountain stood Still. The Mountain stood Silent. The Mountain stood Mighty. And the Mountain whispered “How to fit your littleness into your bigness”.


 Copyright 2013. Face the Mountain. All rights reserved

The Unseen Flower

In my minds eye I saw myself muddy, in the rain,  sitting under a leafless bush, scratchy branches poking at my head. I was delighted to see St. Francis, my guide for peace and humility, sitting beside me, also muddy and barefoot in a simple cloth tunic.

I asked St. Francis if he could help me find peace in my simpleness.  I asked what my role is when I am unable to make others see and feel the gift of inner peace. Why do I feel compelled to do something I can never accomplish. Please teach me how to feel the joy of just Being and Trusting God to use me how He chooses. To affect or not effect according to how He chooses.

He took my right hand and held it gently on my knee and  asked “What if you were the most beautiful flower God had ever created but you existed obscured deep in the bushes beside the road, never to be seen by anyone from bloom to decay? Would that make you a lesser creation of God because you had no role other than to just be that creation of God?”

My answer was ” No because God makes no lesser creations.”

St Francis then asked ” And what if God made you a magnificent butterfly that danced about from flowers to children to weary traveler bringing joy just by being such an amazing creature of God? Would that make you a greater creation of God?”

shrinking vMy answer was “No because if God makes no lesser creations he makes no greater creations.”

And as that magnificent butterfly could you find the humbleness in your heart to match the humbleness of the beautiful flower never seen?”

I didn’t think I had it in me to truthfully answer yes because my joy would be so great I might forget that it was God who created the gifts I would be sharing.

St. Francis leaned in and softly said “Then remember that you are the beautiful flower, hidden in the bushes, that feeds the magnificent butterfly, that you also are. Remember that we are all one as God’s creations designed to nurture each other just by being what God created us to be. That oneness under God’s design makes us all greater and humbled at once, in God’s eyes.



 Copyright 2013. Face the Mountain. All rights reserved 

And in that Moment…..

I remember scary. I remember it everyday. When the sun comes up and I have to do it all over again, that’s scary. Until I realize the air I breath is still there and still as sweet as God’s own breath, and I hear the beautiful songs that the birds are singing to the sun. They may go hungry today or face a fierce storm or lose a hatchling but for this moment they sing to the sun because that is their gift to God’s gift. Returning their joy to be soaked up by all who will stop and listen, in that moment, And in that moment which is all that exist, joy trumps scary because joy is everything God gives us and scary is just an impulse in our brain.

Then comes the next moment and here comes scary again. Maybe bigger and harder this time. We all face it. But do you choose the joy in the moment that God gives and will always give back whenever you stop and breathe it in or do you let scary take that moment away? Honor the battle but Honor more the joy that is yours to live.


exit Pluto's cave

 Copyright 2013. Face the Mountain. All rights reserved.


Turtle Moon

The mass of baby turtles, no bigger than silver dollars, frantically tried to swim through the sand on the beach towards the lulling waves they heard ahead. Breaking against that same beach, the ocean’s waves licked as much of the sand as its awesome tongue could reach, rolling forward all of the debris it could pick up and on its way back devouring even more.

The mother turtles, who had laid their eggs here, had long since left them with only a Knowing.  A Knowing that the sea was their mother. Dark and loud, rushing forward then receding while bringing forth and taking away all at once. The sea was beyond their comprehension, stretching beyond their tiny horizons it must have tested their instincts to run towards this huge unknown.

It was not a quiet kind of unknown. Although the purpose of the race was an unspoken agreement among the silent runners, there were also the sounds of the frenzied spectators feeding on many of them as well as the thrashing sea to distract them from their goal. But they were born with a Knowing that they were too young to have forgotten but not old enough to fear.



Copyright 2013. Face the Mountain. All rights reserved.



Full Soul



Ceremonial gifts
Ceremonial gifts

There are some teachers that have hurt me just by being human in their actions towards me. There are some teachers  that have lifted my head above the water then up to the sky just by being soulful in   their actions towards me.

Remember we are all teachers. Lead with your soul and you will heal the human in both of us.



Copyright 2013. Face the Mountain. All rights reserved

After 9-11

Written 09/12/2001

Who would have thought I would have noticed the lack of contrails in the sky or the absence of air traffic noise. The world had become a surreal place overnight. The passengers on the train uncharacteristically acknowledged each other as if silently comforting each other, but no words were spoken. We were just together.

When I was a little girl I asked my mother what hell was. I couldn’t reconcile myself to the Idea that the God I grew up with  would hurt or torture people. My mom’s answers was simply that hell was the lack of the presence of God. That didn’t sound too bad to me as a child. As a child I couldn’t comprehend what that meant but it was an answer that seemed like a more gentle consequence. A choice already made by the souls that ended up there. After 9/11 I finally understood. I had never realized that God was a constant presence in my life. A part of every second of every day and I had just taken that presence for granted.

On 9/11, for the first time in my life, I felt the absence of God. He had totally left us as if he had never existed. It was the most painful, empty, frightening, lonely feeling I had ever experienced. I remembered what my mom had told me as a child and now it made perfect sense to me.

Several days later God came back to me in a sunset, a way he often shows himself to me, and started to help me heal from his absence. A slow process for all of us. I never want to be in hell again.


Copyright 2013. Face the Mountain. All rights reserved

The Eagle and the Mouse

After the Storm

The power was out because of the hurricane and everyone in the house had gone to bed early. The house was quiet for the loud wind beating down on the outside of the house. I was tired of reading but was not sleepy yet. What else could I do with my time, at night and without electricity?

Listening to this kind of wind was a frightening new experience and I thought this would be the perfect time and atmosphere to meditate, especially since I hadn’t meditated in a while. I closed my eyes and listened to the wind trying to soften it with my thoughts. During the meditation I felt my Native American Guide join me.

Addressing my fear of the wind he asked me to imagine the sound of the wind was the roar of the wings of a swooping eagle and that I was a tiny mouse. I slipped into the scene in my mind. The roar of the wings would send me scurrying, terrified and trying to dig into a hole to hide in but the eagle would swoop down and grab me before I could escape. As the eagle’s claws closed around me and ripped me from the ground her large talons pierced my body hastening my death as I flew in her grasp higher above the trees.

My guide asked”How did the mouse feel as he died? Was he remorseful? Was he consumed by his pain? Was he thinking ‘What if…’? Was he wishing he had done more before he died? Was he angry he didn’t have a chance at a longer better life?

I didn’t have to think about it, remembering his feelings. “No he was trying to stay alive just one more moment and then just another moment and another until he died. He was living in the present, which was all he had at that time.”

Not exactly encouraged by what I thought was a lesson in staying in the present I asked my guide “But what good did this do the mouse?” I didn’t get it. Then my Guide pointed out the real lesson. The bigger picture. “The mouse was taken to the nest and he was fed to her to the eaglets. Now he is not a little mouse but part of two great eagles.”


Copyright 2013. Face the Mountain. All rights reserved


The Twisted Tree


 The twisted tree danced and swam around the vortex too slowly for the human eye to see but creating a most beautiful sculpture. It coiled and dipped, sung and swooned for decades unnoticed by everyone but the charmer, Mother Earth. As she played her music, she softly guided its microscopic movements with her gentle fingertips and subtle lullabies.

Now a masterpiece, it continues to dance, still unseen in the moment, but now its charms us and calls us closer with its mystery to experience for ourselves the same gentle fingertips and the hum of the lullaby flowing through the vortex.      



Copyright 2013. Face the Mountain. All rights reserved